


The Walking Whatevers

by CrazyMindsThinkAlike



Series: The Walking Dead Cracks [1]
Category: The Walking Dead & Related Fandoms
Genre: But I think that's kinda the point, Crack, Don't Judge, Hopefully Humor, Humor, I think I did bad, Michonne and Rick hate each other, Sorry for you all who expected something great, THIS IS CRACK PPL, This is probably going to be a Badfic, enjoy
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-07-02
Updated: 2019-07-23
Packaged: 2020-06-02 19:38:16
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 615
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19448179
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/CrazyMindsThinkAlike/pseuds/CrazyMindsThinkAlike
Summary: This is a crackfic guys! No need to tell you what it is about!Okay, I'll give you a hint!Rick and Michonne hates each other. Carl and Enid loves each other alittletoo much. Negan and Judith is invovled in this somehow, but I guess we'll see!





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Dear Readers,
> 
> Bro! Man! I totes made this fic!
> 
> Okay, enough talking like that. That just will make people hate me. If they don't already.
> 
> Enjoy all the cracks n' laughes!
> 
> Sincerely,  
> Marie Ann
> 
> (P.S. Please, PLEASE no bad comments! Well, I mean, go ahead, but I believe I can delete them. But I'm not going to. It's not me being a jerk. A rule I had maDe for myself a while ago: Don't like, don't review. Like, AND REVIEW NO MATTER WHAT!)

** I FORGOT TO DO DISCLAIMER!!!!!!!! **

Disclaimer: I do not own The Walking Dead or its characters. I only own this story.

Now let's actually get to the story!

™™™™™™™™™™™™™™™™™™™™™™™™™™™™™™™™™™™

"No! It's your fault!" Carl and Enid barged into the room where they heard the fighting. _Oh,_ they thought. _It's just Rick and Michonne. Cool. I bet it's nothing to be worried about. Let's kiss._

Carl and Enid turned to each other and started to kiss. And kiss. And kiss. And tongue. And kiss. Maybe kiss some more.

"Would you two gross, stupid, disgusting, ugly idiots stop kissing?!" Either Rick or Michonne yelled. Nobody but them knew who said that; their voices sounded exactly the same.

Carl broke the kiss and dramatically gasped. "Why would you tell me to stop? That is cruelty to children! I mean teens! I'm not a child!"

"So is calling us names!" Enid butted in. Carl quickly shook his head.

"That part is fine," he says.

"Oh. Okay then!" Enid smiles at Carl and starts to go in to kiss him. But then…

" _ALL AROUND THE PLA-ANT, BIRDIE CHASES WORMIE, WORMIE TAKES A RIDE IN HIS MOUTH. PLOP! GOES THE TURDIE!_ " Negan moonwalks right in the room singing that gruesome song.

"Would you _please_ stop singing that gruesome song?"

"Nope! Because I own this place!"

"No you don't!"

"Yes I do!

"No you don't!"

"Yes I fucking deliciously cupcakeying do!"

Carl dramamtically gasps again. "How dare you speak that language on front of a child!"

"Oh yeah," Negan says. "Sorry Carl."

"No! Not _ME_!" Carl yells.

"Then who? You are the only child I see!"

Enid couldn't help but smile at that. That was seriously funny!

"That child!" Carl points to the ground at Negan's feet. There, was little Judith! Wait. Is she… _chewing_ on Negan's purple jeans? That's the weirdest thing yet!

"Oh."

# Carl crouches down to the girl. "Hello, um… uh, what's your name?"

## "Goo!" Judith says.

### "Goo it is then! Nice to meet you!" Carl shakes Judith's hand.

#### "Let's just get to the matter at hand here!" who everyone believed was Michonne said. "It was Rick's fault the airport burned down!!"

##### Oh. So it _was_ Michonne who spoke. And as soon as everyone knew that, they all went back to whatever they were doing. Carl and Enid slobbered over each other (oh, yeah! they kissed too!), Negan went back to singing the gruesome song, Goo started to chew on Negan's purple jeans again, and Rick and Michonne went back to arguing.

###### And they all lived happily ever- **"NO! IT'S _YOUR_ FAULT!!!!!!"**


	2. "I Love My Purple Jeans…"

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Negan just _loves_ his purple jeans.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Dear Readers,
> 
> I hope you enjoy this next chapter! Tell me if you want more! :)
> 
> Marie Ann

**_"I LOVE MY PURPLE JEANS!"_** Negan yelled.

"No one cares!" someone in the distance said. Negan didn't pay any mind to it.

That's when he noticed carl running upside down towards him.

,,¿ooG nees uoy evah,, he asked.

"No, I haven't seen her. Why?"

Carl went back to standing the right way. "There she is!"

"Where?"

"There!"

"Where?"

"There!"

"Wh-"

#  **"Goo!"**

Goo said. 

"Stop chewing on my purple jeans!" Negan yelled. "I love these purple jeans! My great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great grandpa gave them to me!"

"You 583,926th grandpa is probably dead anyway!" Carl said going to pick up Goo. But then he changed his mind.

# "Who are you calling old and dead, Sonny boy?!"

Negan's great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great grandfather was there!

"There's my favorite grandpa!" Negan bellowed.

"Holy mighty Jesus!" Carl said, then went to his knees and bowed down to the (quite old) man.

"My name is not Jesus!" the old man said. "My name is… Bob."

"Hello, Bob!" Carl yelled. "How old are you?"

"583,926 years old!" 

Carl just blinkinked at him very fast. "Oh…kay."

"YUP!" Bob roared.

 **"I LOOOOOVE MY PURPLE JEANS!"** Negan said.

The End…?


End file.
